Theories and Rants
by Constellation Temptation
Summary: I know, this has been done countless times, but all of these theories I come up with myself. I refuse to put in things that everybody already knows. You can tell me your theories, and I'll try to find some truth to them. After all, a single person can't solve all the mysteries of Gravity Falls alone.
1. Chapter 1

"Hello everybody, and welcome. Through the powers of the three journals, I bring all you readers and writers together for- yes, I know, I wasted a power that can bring ultimate power and bring back the dead for a silly thing like writers block. Look, it's better this way. Imagine if that power fell into the wrong hands? Anyway, where was I?" I stare at the ceiling, trying to remember.

"How you brought us all here." someone pointed out.

"Thanks... wait, I don't remember seeing you here before. Are you new to the site?"

"Uh... you could put it that way..." he steps back into the crowd, trying to blend in.

"Hey, wait a second, is that a tophat you're wearing?" I point to the skinny, black, tube like thing on his head.

"You'll never catch me suckers!" the boy transforms into a yellow triangle and floats out the door at an astonishing speed.

"After him!" I sick two security guards on him. "Anyway, I gathered you all here to take part in a theory fanfic. I know, this has been done countless times, but i'm always coming up with these crazy things no other human being has ever come up with before. I'll go over a few that I came up with and shared. All of which, I have been told sound sciencey enough to be true. Anyway, theory 1!

**The Gideon Get-up :** This is what I have just been calling it recently. Gideon is a possessed doll! I know what you're thinking, where the heck did that come from? Why would he be a doll? Well, you can't have a theory unless you have at least some evidence to back it up. And evidence I have!

**Number 1:** The termites. Remember in "Little Dipper", how Gideon had those evil, Egyptian termites, or whatever type of termites those were, I think they were cursed, I dunno. Anyway, if you recall correctly, they went straight for Gideon. Seem strange? Wood I tell ya, he's a wooden doll!

**Number 2:** Remember what Bill says to Gideon when they first met? "I'm guessing your some kind of living ventriloquist dummy."

Incase your wondering what that is, it's basically a puppet. You know, you put your hand in the back, it made of **wood. **And you throw your voice to make it sound like it's talking. They also tend to be kinda creepy. Oh please, don't tell me that you haven't, at one point or another, you thought Gideon was a creep. Anyway, if Gideon was a possessed doll, then he would be light a puppet master. In a way.

**Number 3: **Gideon's mom. She is traumatized, that's for sure. Isn't that what spirits and possessed dolls do? Traumatize people (Or in some cases, hunt them down, and then kill them) Yeah, this is kinda a minor theory, but when you have a bunch of big pieces of evidence, you need some hinted bits here and there to keep it all in place.

**Number 4: **Have you ever noticed that Gideon always acts like he's older than the twins. I mean, he's only nine while Dipper and Mabel are twelve. Yet he's always calling Dipper "Boy" which is usually said by people that are at least one year older. If Gideon is a doll, he can live forever. And if he can live forever, than who knows how long he's been here already?

**Number 5: **The hairspray. If you've ever had to clean up hairspray after your little sister, then you know that they have been playing with barbies. Whatever it is they make their hair out of, it's really hard to keep it in a certain hairstyle, no matter how much hairspray you use. If Gideon's a doll, than he would have the same sort of hair, thus, all the hairspray.

**Number 6: **This should actually be the first one instead of the last one, but OK. Gideon is always acting cute and whatever, right? And for some reason, the town buys his act. Like, what? Anyway, it's the same with dolls. You have to be sane like the Pine's family to see how creepy and evil he really is. Say my sister and I are in a room together. She is playing with a barbie. I think it's evil and just creepy, she thinks it's cute. See where i'm going with this? Thought so. Moving on to the next theory!

**Stan's Twin: **I know what you're thinking. There's no way I made this up. The Stanley theory has been going around for a long time, and you doubt I was the one to come up with it. Well, your right, but I never said it was Stanley. Think about it. Who in their right mind would give their children the same name. Well, NO ONE! OK, This is what I think. I don't necessarily believe in all of this, and I mean the theory I came up with, but it's a possibility Stan's brother's _real _name is William. Stanford and William, A.K.A, Stan and Bill. I know, it's way out there, but hear me out. Remember when Gideon mentioned Stan to Bill, the first image he saw? It looked like they were fighting in Stan's secret vending machine room, right? What if Stan had accidentally pushed Bill into the portal? That would be why he looks the way he does now, and has all these powers. The portal leads to infinite worlds and ultimate power. Bill _has _powers very similar to the description. Plus, Stan's brother was a bookworm. Bill knows everything, but how would he acquire this knowledge? Some from watching everybody, some from books, some from being pushed into the portal. Who knows? There have been crazier theories!

**The Whole Bowtie thing: **Your probably staring at your screen, saying, "What you talking about?"Well, if you haven't noticed, a lot of people wear bow ties in the show. If not, like for the girls, they wear hair ribbons. What's with that? Almost every main character on the Bill Cipher Wheel has worn a bow tie at least once. And Bill wears one ALL THE TIME! Now your wonder why this is suspicious. "So what, ties are formal, a lot of regular people wear them too." I bet that's what your thinking. Well, that's true, but anything is possible in Gravity Falls. Here is a list of when each character has been seen wearing a tie. This only includes characters on the Bill wheel, mind you.

Dipper- Wore tie to party in "Double Dipper"

Mabel- Wore hair ribbon to party in "Double Dipper"

Robbie- OK, technically, he wore it only in Dipper's nightmare\day dream thing in "Double Dipper" but he still wore it!

Gideon- He used to wear a tie in "The Hand That Rocks the Mabel". His amulet was on his bowtie, so when it was broken, he started to wear a different tie.

Stan- I don't think I need to tell you which episodes he wears a tie in. Basically, every episode he's in his suit.

Wendy- Wore tie in "Double Dipper"

Toby Determined- Every episode he's in.

Bill- Seriously?

See a pattern here? I'm sure it's just me being all, "I need to uncover something huge because if I don't there will be nothing to entertain my ever boring life until Gravity Falls comes back!" Anyway, just something to think about.

**Small things that caught my attention: **OK, did you notice that in the show, everything, not including characters, appear twice? Here are some examples.

#1. Vampires. They are mentioned in "Tourist Trapped" and are mentioned again in "The Deep End"

#2. Hamster Balls. They are in the mind, once in Mabel's imagination in "Legend of the Gobblewonker", and later in "Dreamscapers"

#3. Tyler and Craz. Again, Mabel's imagination sceen in "Legend of the Gobblewonker" and then in "Dreamscapers"

#4. Blind folds. First in "Legend of the Gobblewonker" and then in "Fight Fighter" when Mabel tricks Stan into wearing one when taking him up high to try to conquer his fear.

#5. Car crashing through fences. "Legend of the Gobblewonker" and "Boyz Crazy"

#6. The "Guys". In "Legend of the Gobblewonker" Stan says they don't "Like" or "trust" him, and then in "Fight Fighters", he says he was gonna call them up to place some bets.

#7. Cleaning out ears. Yeah, don't know why I added this, but it was in this category! Anyway, in "Legend of the Gobblewonker" Stan is cleaning out his ear with his pinkie, and in "Time Traveler's Pig" Dipper hears screaming and isn't sure whether or not he's imagining it, so he cleans out his ear.

#8. "Mystery Twins". Soos calls Dipper and Mabel this in "Headhunters" and it is said again by Dipper in "Irrational Treasure."

#9. Smile Dip. First in "The Inconveniencing." and then in "Boyz Crazy" when Dipper thinks Mabel got a hold of the cursed candy again when she's dancing.

#10. The Sun glasses on the sun. You know, on the towel. First in "Legend of the Gobblewonker" where they use it as a flag, and in "The Deep End" where Dipper asks Soos why a Sun would need Sun Glasses. Soos' answer was "It's best not to think about it."

#11. Wax Stan. First in "Headhunters" and then in "The Deep End" where it shows him melting.

#12. Beavers. In "Legend of the Gobblewonker" and in the diner in "Dipper VS Manliness"

#13. Hearing a noise, thinking it was a monster, and having it turn out to be an animal with a man-made object. The beaver and chainsaw in "Legend of the Gobblewonker" and then in a Gravity Falls short called "The Hide Behind" had an owl holding a maraca.

#14. Glass randomly being carried around. In "Legend of the Gobblewonker" two men were, for some reason, carrying a frame of glass across the water, and in "Irrational Treasure" two men are carrying a frame of dirt glass, also for some strange unknown reason.

#15. Sleepovers. In "Double Dipper" and again in "Carpet Diem."

#16. Duck-tective was first introduced to the show in "Headhunters" and comes back in "Little Dipper"

#17. Keyboard. Soos plays some things on the keyboard in "Headhunters" and when he's DJ in "Double Dipper"

#18. Dipper has a big head. He says this himself when looking at Tyrone in "Double Dipper" and Stan says he has a big head in "Dreamscapers."

#19. Mysteries. Sure, Gravity Falls is full of them, but the twins go on adventures all the time, not mysteries. The only mysteries are in "Headhunters" and "Irrational Treasure"

#20. Soos finds hidden room. First in "Headhunters" and again in "Carpet Diem"

Trust me, this isn't even half of the things I've noticed. And get this, they only happen one other time in the series. Nothing is mentioned three times! Anyway, that's all for this chapter. Next I'll talk about the Dipper clones, and you bet that I'm not leaving out number 3 and 4


	2. Clones!

Sup guys. I'm back, and have more crazy Gravity Falls theories, all original. Anyway, first off, we have this small one. I came across this song called "Dicsord" and I saw that the band was called "The Living Tombstones". I thought this sounded familiar, so I watched some episodes of Gravity Falls, one of which was "Fight Fighters", and I realized something. Robbie's band is called "Robbie and the Tombstones" Like, what? Is he really a brony? Anyway, just something I thought of. Next...

Alright, let's move on to the clones. I have a theory. What if when you use the cloning machine, you don't make a copy of yourself, but instead, you split yourself in half. Like, half of your personality and your memories would go to one half, and the rest would go to the other. You wouldn't be cloning yourself, you would be creating your twin! This way, water wouldn't kill them, because really, there just a part of you, taken out, and created another living being. But of course, it's no longer apart of you, but yet, it's still you. You would only be able to use the machine once reason the Dipper clones were able to be killed using water and he was able to use it more that once is because Dipper was already cut in half before he was born, in other words, the machine can't be used. Mabel is already his twin, and he can't be cut in half a third time. Because of this, he can make many clones, but they can be killed with water.

Another thing with clones. You know how we all see the clones as the bad guys? We all wonder why they turned on Dipper. Is it really only because of a girl? NO! They were smart. They realized what Dipper was going to do before even he knew it himself. You see, he only cloned them so he could have a dance with Wendy. But what happens after the dance is over? What happens when there are ten Dipper's all running around the shack. What happens when there isn't enough money to buy food for all of them. You can't have more than one version of the same person running around. Dipper wasn't thinking when he made so many versions of himself. The only thing that he could do, had all the clones not turn on him, and survive till the end of the party, then Dipper would have to kill them all. He would have been the villain. I think realizing this made the clones worry, so they all tried to get rid of him. Or I could just be crazy, and since they were Dipper, they wouldn't really think like a clone that way, because they still use Dipper's mind like they were the original. But seriously, if Alex Hirsch didn't make the story go the way it did, Dipper would be looked down on, and become a hated character.

OK, OK, enough about the clones that died. Let's talk about the clones that are still _alive. _Where the hell are clones #3 and #4? Nobody knows, but as I've said before, everything comes back twice. Next season guys! They will be back! Unless of course Robbie did catch them... that could have happened, I mean, he comes back later in the episode, and he has his bike with him...

Until next time everyone!


	3. Chapter 3

What is with the twins and stars? Your probably wondering what i'm talking about. Well, Mabel's sweater has a shooting star on it, right? That's her connection to stars. And remember Dipper's old hat? The one he had in "Tourist Trapped"? It had a star on it too. So in the beginning, the twins both wore stars on their clothing. Still don't believe me? Dipper's birthmark is a ****ing constellation! Now do you see what I mean? The twins represent stars or something. Maybe in season two, a new pair of kids will come, and they'll represent moons or suns or clouds or something. Anyway, that's just something that popped into my head.

Now, let's talk about the author of the books. Supposedly, Old Man McGucket wrote them. And I believe that he did, but I came up with some evidence that _isn't _the leaked image. I mean seriously, anyone could have drawn that, but say that it is real. In the picture, Old Man McGucket has six fingers, right? But in the show, he only has five. Why is that? Well, on the hand that was seen with six fingers, he wears a cast. But he never takes it off. And his hand seems to function just fine. In "Gideon Rises", he doesn't wear it, But he is seen wearing a glove on that hand instead. Where am I going with this? Well, remember the blood on the "Bill Cipher" Page of the journal? There's blood. Some people speculate that the author was killed by Bill. But if that's true, then how is Old Man McGucket alive? I think that the blood came from his finger. I think he cut his sixth finger off so Bill wouldn't be able to find him. He wears the cast to cover up where his extra finger used to be. So, that's why he wears a cast, and also why he only has five fingers. This would also explain why there is blood on the page. But i'm not finished yet. Why is he so cray-cray? He's a mad man, but why? Remember in "Gideon Rises", How Gideon said that he had to much knowledge for one man? Emphasize the _too_ _much_. _Too much_ knowledge can make you go insane, because there's _too much_! Anyway, that's my two theories for today! Tell me what you think of them in the reviews!


End file.
